Leading Your Family Through Advent

While it’s an ancient church tradition, Advent has been making a comeback in evangelical circles in the last decade. If you were raised in church, you may have experienced a tradition in church where candles on a wreath were lit each Sunday in December– and that was Advent. Or maybe, “Advent” in your mind is often followed by the word “calendar” and you think of a paper calendar with little doors that you open and get a piece of chocolate.

You may also hear the word “Advent” and be genuinely confused, having no idea what it means.

Advent means coming or arrival. It’s a liturgical tradition meant to focus the church’s mind and heart on the 2nd coming of Christ through reflecting on his first coming (his birth in Bethlehem). We slowly anticipate Christmas Day where we finally get to exclaim “Jesus is born!” As we wait, we remember that though it felt like a long time for the Israelites to wait for the promised Messiah, He really did come– God really did fulfill His promise to send a Savior. So, we conclude believing that if Jesus really did come the first time, we can be certain that He is coming again. 

Advent is intended to be more than candles lit on Sunday mornings or chocolates to be eaten daily (though I’m a big fan of any excuse to eat a piece of chocolate). It is meant to be a heart-preparation… a time of reflection, reading, prayer and worship. As Joy to the World says, “let every heart prepare Him room.”

As parents, we have the joy of leading our family to “prepare room” in their hearts for the arrival of Jesus. At Christmas, our kids are inundated with toy catalogs, festive music, and sugar. It's easy to get in a tizzy at Christmas. However, I want to gently encourage us to set the pace for our families that keeps the main thing (slowing down to meaningfully reflect and worship Jesus) the main thing (even with a busy schedule). 

Jesus is the main thing at Christmas.

At TCC Kids, we often talk about our Family Discipleship Framework– modeling, time, moments and milestones. These are simple buckets we encourage you to think through as you consider how to point your kids to Jesus. To serve you, I am going to briefly walk through these buckets below to think through how you could incorporate some fresh ideas to your family.

 
 

Modeling

Kids learn by observing. 

You contribute to educating your children just by simply being a follower of Christ in front of them. We don’t “model” in a hypocritical way– doing something just to show our kids how to do it, but from a genuine heart as a Christ-follower. 

This Advent season, consider carving out quiet space for you personally to reflect on Christ’s birth. There are a lot of great devotionals, Bible Reading plans, and worship playlists to help facilitate that. Pick one that’s a natural fit for you. Figure out how and when you’ll study. Seek God this Christmas. 

Need some recommendations? Check out this list. 

 
 

Time

Parents create space for a focused time of studying God’s Word, praying and singing together.

There is not a one-size fits all approach on how to have a Bible study time with your family. There are a lot of different dynamics at play for each family. However, it is important that the Christian family gathers regularly to read God’s Word, pray and worship. It can be at the dinner table, circled up in the living room, kneeling beside the bed, or huddled around the kitchen island during breakfast. It can be 5 minutes or 20 minutes. It can be daily or 1-2x a week. The main thing isn’t how it happens, but that it happens. God has given us a task as parents to tell our children about His Word (Deuteronomy 6). At Christmas, narrow your Bible study in on the birth of Christ.

There are a ton of different ways to do this– our family will be using the Pip and J Jesse Tree ornaments and reading a story from the Jesus Storybook Bible. We have also used Advent Blocks, or simply picked a few key passages of Scripture without a resource and talked about them around the dinner table. One year, we worked on memorizing a portion of Luke 2 together. We keep a stack of old hymnals collected at used bookstores around our piano and at Christmas, we like to pull them out and sing Christmas hymns from them together. Again, pick what works for your family. If you need recommendations, check out this list.


 
 

Moments

Parents capture and leverage opportunities in the course of everyday life for the purpose of gospel-centered conversations.

Christmas is dripping with moments that we can turn towards Christ. 

  • When riding to see Christmas lights, we can exclaim “Did you know that people decorate with lights, because when Jesus came, he pierced through the darkness and was the Light of the World?”

  • “I love going Christmas shopping and thinking through what to give each of you. It is a way I get to show you how attentively God loves us and delights to give us good gifts. It also reminds me that the ultimate gift was that he gave us his son, Jesus, to be our Savior.”

  • “I love hearing Christmas carols playing in the grocery store! Did you hear that it just said ‘Joy to the World, the Lord is come… let earth receive her King?’ The Bible says that even the rocks will cry out that he is glorious and worthy of worship. I am amazed that literally the whole world stops and cries out worship to him. We need to pray that these truths would sink into their hearts and they would see him as the king!”

Be on the lookout for moments when you see evidence of the Lord at work and exclaim it to your kids! How can they see how amazing God really is?!

 
 


Milestones

Parents mark and make occasions to celebrate and commemorate significant spiritual milestones of God’s work in the life of the family and child. 

Christmas is another phenomenal opportunity to mark moments in your family’s lives. In a few places in the Old Testament, God commands the Israelites to make stones of remembrance after he parts seas and they walk through on dry ground or he does other miraculous wonders. These stones of remembrance were to be permanent physical reminders that children would look at and say, “Why is that there?” Their parents, then, would be given the opportunity to recount God's goodness.

We all know about our favorite traditions– baking cookies, going caroling, or a festive Christmas party. However, what if we dreamed of how we could infuse them with spiritual significance? How could some moment at Christmas be given a special place of honor that we look forward to year after year.. And they pass down to their children… but it’s centered on Christ? 

  • Could you make a family slideshow of photos from the past year and take time to reflect on how God has been working in your family in 2023?

  • Could you have a tradition where you write a letter to each child on Christmas Day speaking words of love, affirmation and the gospel over them? 

  • Could you have a night of simple worship by candlelight, singing favorite Christmas worship songs together?

  • Could you make a gift for a family in need or a missionary overseas, and pray over that family?

Milestones act like anchors in a child’s life. 

I cannot wait to see the way the Lord uses this Advent season in the life of your family. I would love to celebrate with you – please share whatever resources you are using or sweet moments you’ve had! We are partnering with you through this journey of pointing your children to Jesus! 

Michael Guyer